#floridalife

"Baeromez" (Baeromez) 09/25/2015 at 12:29 • Filed to: None

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One of my neighbors owns a Volt. One of my neighbors owns a Viper. One of my neighbors owns a 356. One of my neighbors owns 3 Corvettes, and one of my neighbors owns 3 Lexus RXs.

I just walked 3 miles in jeans, in 90 degree heat, without breaking a sweat and to celebrate I’m going to get drunk as fuck on the beach all day. #floridalife

In retrospect, I may be slightly dehydrated. #floridalife

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 12:39

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It’s so fucking hot out. I hate this place. Whereabouts on America’s flaccid penis are you?

jariten1781 > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 12:47

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A neighbor that just moved out had 3 identical previous gen silver Civic sedans. Your neighbors have better cars.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 12:47

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I’ve been stuck outside all day doing senior pep rally bs

Baeromez > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 13:16

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Cocoa Beach

Baeromez > jariten1781 09/25/2015 at 13:17

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I mean, yeah, I guess so. But seriously, 3 RXs. They only have 2 people in their house and they have 3 RXs.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 13:18

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Ahh, that’s quite a ways away. The other thing that sucks about Florida - everything’s so far from the next thing.

Baeromez > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 13:22

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Yeah, but it’s the 3rd best town in FL. Come visit me dawg, I’ll buy you all the Bloody Marys.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 13:24

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Haha, third best? I’m afraid to ask what numbers one and two are. I’m in Ft. Myers. Cocoa Beach is like 3-4 hours away.

Baeromez > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 13:30

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Aw, hell. You know, I’m pretty sure PS9 is around here somewhere too. Marathon and Orlando are 1 and 2 in no particular order.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 13:38

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I don’t think I’ve ever been to Marathon. I’ve always hated Orlando, though. My top picks are Lake Worth (surprisingly weird little town that’s cheap and has so many colorful anarchists that one even managed to make it into their city government), Gainesville (full of frat bros and sorority basic bitches, but when you put 50000 kids in a town, cool things happen), and Jacksonville Beach. Yeah, there are a bunch of Florida Oppos, but we’re all like a billion miles away from each other except JQJ and I.

Baeromez > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 13:42

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Jacks Beach is the shit. It’s like Cocoa Beach on steroids. Lake Worth is pretty cool, too. Gainsville’s alright. Orlando is the shit if you know where to go (spoiler: downtown). It’s so big, there’s always something cool going on in some part of it.

deekster_caddy > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 13:44

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My dad lives in Ft Myers, we were down there this summer for a bit to visit. You have to put on so many miles just running errands it’s ridiculous! Everything is so far away from everything else!

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 13:47

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I think most of my Orlando time has been spent downtown going to shows. I don’t know. It always just seemed like a slightly larger version of Generic Anywhere, Fl.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > deekster_caddy 09/25/2015 at 13:52

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Yeah, it’s what happens when everything is a private development. There is no logical central plan.

Baeromez > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 09/25/2015 at 14:01

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But the bars, man, the bars! Next time you’re in O-Town check out Corona Cigar Co . It’s my absolute favorite downtown spot. You can get a $3 beer or a $12k shot of prohibition-era whiskey, plus they have the biggest cigar store in town built right into the bar. It’s the tits.

Flman1967 > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 14:05

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One of your neighbors has a 75 Pontiac convertible. Me. I've often thought Cocoa Beach has a high quotient of cool cars to people. Lots of microbuses, I took a picture out my windshield once once of a real GT40 driving up a1a, there's a 427 Cobra replica running around that I see occasionally.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 14:05

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Wow, I’ll have to check that out next time I’m in town. Drinking is never an issue since I usually have a hotel downtown when I go up there.

Baeromez > Flman1967 09/25/2015 at 14:23

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Cool, man! Come down to Johnathan’s Pub some time and shoot the shit with me. I’ll be the guy ranting about how GM should have stuck with DOHC after the C4 ZR1. Have you seen that old Bugatti replica that’s been cruising around town?

Tohru > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 14:43

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In the news tomorrow: “Florida Man Tries to Drink Ocean While Drunk”

Baeromez > Tohru 09/25/2015 at 14:47

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“No drink is too big for Florida Man!”

Tohru > Baeromez 09/25/2015 at 14:57

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I also think your neighbors with the 3 RX’s might be serial killers.